I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Randomize
