i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
