You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Thank you for not boning my boss.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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