There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
