Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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