1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Randomize
