currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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