Taylor Swift is so right about you.
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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