Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
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