Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
