Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
