in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Randomize
