good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Randomize