I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
