the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Randomize
