i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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