Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
