i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
