I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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