no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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