it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
