We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Randomize
