K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
