i already hear my dad disowning me
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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