I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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