Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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