I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
