I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Randomize
