yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
