i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Did I show you my penis last night?
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
