i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
