theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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