hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
And then he peed in my hair
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