she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
God I need to hump something, right now.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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