hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
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