I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize
