A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
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