guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
