Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
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