We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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