i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
