Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
