I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
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