I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
