his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
