I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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