With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Let's paint friendship bongs
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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