we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize