he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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