I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
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