SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
